Making them dance to your music moves you way up there on the evolutional ladder. Make them want to copy anything you do, no matter how stupid it really is. Not only it will give you unlimited power, distinction and influence, it also provides great laughs with your friends in between holes.

Works on any scale:

Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the Axis of Evil, Libya,
China and Syria today announced they had formed the Axis of Just as
Evil, which they said would be way eviler than that stupid Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of his State of the Union address.

Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the new axis as
having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are Just as Evil...
in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim Jong-Il. "Everybody
knows we're the best evils... best at being evil... we're the best."

Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over being excluded,
although they conceded they did ask if they could join the Axis of Evil.
"They told us it was full," said Syrian President Bashar al-Assad. "An
Axis can't have more than three countries," explained Iraqi President
Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's tradition. In World War II you
had Germany, Italy and Japan in the Evil Axis. So you can only have three.
And a secret handshake. Ours is wicked cool."

International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil declaration was swift, as
within minutes, France surrendered. Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations
rushed to gain triumvirate status in what became a game of geopolitical
chairs. Cuba, Sudan and Serbia said they had formed the Axis of Somewhat
Evil, forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the Axis of
Occasionally Evil, while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the
Axis of Not So Much Evil Really As Just Generally Disagreeable.

With the criteria suddenly expanded and all the desirable clubs filling
up, Sierra Leone, El Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the Axis of
Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the
Olympics; Canada, Mexico, and Australia formed the Axis of Nations That
Are Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Nasty Thoughts About America,
while Spain, Scotland, and New Zealand established the Axis of Countries
That Be Allowed to Ask Sheep to Wear Lipstick. "That's not a threat,
really, just something we like to do," said Scottish Executive First
Minister Jack McConnell.

While wondering if the other nations of the world weren't perhaps making
fun of him, a cautious Bush granted approval for most axes, although he
rejected the establishment of the Axis of Countries Whose Names End in
"Guay", accusing one of its members of filing a false application.
Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay, and Chadguay denied the charges.

Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't want to join any Axis, but privately,
world leaders said that's only because no one asked them.

(Asha George)